How to be Mad
by Happy-kat Hikara
Summary: I was just a regular girl, with a regular life, that is untill the white rabbit pushed me into Wonderland. Now I'll never be sane again. SoraXKairi
1. Make an Imaginary Friend

Disclaimer: Though I have an almost complete, functioning brain, I don't own Kingdom Hearts, Alice in Wonderland or anything I may happen to mention that is a company, brand, etc. I do own a plastic fork, though!

Thanks to anyone reading this, it makes me feel all special! I would give you a cookie but I don't know you and wouldn't be able to get it to you before it starts to mold. (If cookies grow mold)

How to Be Mad

Lesson.1 Make an imaginary friend

This is pathetic. I've got a figment of my imagination staring at me. And no, it's not a pink elephant or a talking zebra; it's an actually humanoid imagination. I hate those. To make things worse, I'm hanging from a chandelier by my foot. What's that? Kairi, why don't you just drop down? Unfortunately, I am not about to risk finding out how far it is, nor am I about to try doing any of those twirly flips that many would do. (Or so my imagination is telling be I could do from feet below) And look; now he's laughing! I can feel the blood rush to my face, and it's not only because I'm upside down. I'm going to get him when I get down from here. This is all that rabbit's fault. Yeah, she's on my list too.

5 hours before

"Kairi, wanna go somewhere?"

I looked up from the intense telepathic conversation with the wood of my desk to stare at the brunet next to me. This, of course, was my best friend, the world renowned specimen called Hyperatus Selphiatus, or Selphie for short. High in the jungles of school she roams, her bright yellow giving her away. I have never seen her without a yellow outfit on. Ever. Even though the uniform is blue and white, she has yellow ribbons tied to her sleeves and a bright yellow belt on. And her hair, wow, most people who try can't get it to stick up at that angle. How does she get it to curl that way? I wonder if she needs gel or something for that…..whatever. Dang, I just forgot what she was talking about. Better ask her to repeat it in a way she won't notice I wasn't listening.

"What?" Okay, I think that went wrong.

"Well," she's nervous, I wonder why, she's always so straight-forward, "Do you want to come over after school, we could hang out or something."

"I thought you were going to ask if I wanted to skip the last hour of school before break."

We crack up; it's always been a joke with us because most of our friends skipped the last day of school. We're not coming back for about 3 months, so might as well start that a day before the rest, right? (I'm going by my school schedule, maybe not yours) Besides, being sixteen does that too you. I know that there's only supposed to be Senioritis, but a little-known fact is that Junioritus is a serious ailment for kids in the eleventh grade. The urge to be lazy and skip isn't just for the graduating class anymore. Some of my classmates even had Freshmanitus in ninth grade, which is a rare case that is so closely related the only difference is the age of those contaminated with it. (These are not real ailments, just excuses for behavior problems in school, just to let you know)

"Sure Selphie, I just have to call my mom after school, to tell her where I am."

Well, she's not really my real mother, and she doesn't care what I do. But if I don't tell her, she blames me for whatever is wrong in the house. I was adopted a couple years ago by her and her husband, knowing nothing of the first 10 or so years of my life but my name, Kairi. I didn't know my last name, where I came from, or anything else, and my foster parents just wanted a kid to help their political careers. They both have prominent names in the world of politics, and it looks better if they are 'taking care of a poor, orphaned girl with nowhere to go.'

For the rest of the hour, we mainly talked of what we were going to do. Selphie had found a cool new spot on Destiny Island, so we were going to see it. Destiny Island is one of the only places that I can be free of my parents and any of my troubles. It's a small island not far from Transverse Town, but no one really goes there. Some people say it's haunted, because people have gone there and didn't come back. It's kind-of rundown, with trees and plants growing everywhere. Really spooky if you go there at night, but during the day it's beautiful. It used to be a tourist attraction, a vacation in paradise, until the manager disappeared one day. When we were younger, Selphie and I used to call it our own kingdom and we would go through the broken-down tree houses pretending to be princesses out to save the world.

"Remember when you fell out of that tree and we had to throw you in the water to shut you up?"

"Or the time we slept in one of the houses to see a ghost?"

"You thought it was a ghost, I still say it was the Loch Ness Monster's cousin."

"What about the time you dared me to eat a paopu fruit."

"You could only eat half before you spit it back out!"

"It was nasty!"

"Bring"

We all ran out of the classroom, most kids sprinting down the halls to get out. Once out in the sunshine, I took out the hair tie in my auburn hair, shaking out the stiffness. Ah, no more school for months! I looked out at all the people running off to go home, or to celebrate. With this being a small town, there weren't many kids in the school, but it still had the effect of a stampede. Oh yeah, I almost forgot, I need to call my mom. Then find Selphie, she wandered off somewhere. I took my phone from my shoulder bag and dialed my mom.

"Hello?"

"Hey mom, I'm going to hang out with Selphie today, okay?"

"Fine, whatever, as long as you don't miss the election speech in a few days." So I can be gone until then and she won't worry.

"Sure mom, I'll be sure to make it."

"Oh, and I need to tell you, you're going to have a baby brother or sister."

"What a surprise, congra…"

"Goodbye Kairi."

"Click"

"Bye."

I fell back against a tree, my phone falling from my hands. A baby? A million thoughts ran through my head. How long had she known this? When was she going to tell me this? I pulled my legs up to my chin and breathing deeply. It's like I really don't belong with that family. Now that my mother was having a baby, that child would be all the publicity they need. No one would remember the girl who sat off in the background of all the parties and other social outings my family was at. What if I just disappeared? Wow, that sounds depressing.

I need to cheer up. Maybe if I got out of this uniform, I would feel better. I got up to find Selphie. She said she had to call someone before we left the class. I turned to my left to find her off in a corner, talking in a low voice to someone. Well that's different. Come to think of it, Selphie was sneaky and suspicious all day. Maybe she's hiding something, like she ate all of my chocolate pudding. That must be it; she was like this when she ate the last of my cookies too. And now she's sending her secret Mafia gang out to their underground dealers to get more chocolate pudding. But wait, what if she had them poison it, so as to get rid of the evidence of her run-ins with the law that didn't really happen but I can pretend I saw. Mwahaha, she'll get it if my pudding kills me with its green poison. She's going down.

Getting my trusty weapon, (a spork with an angry face sharpied on) I oh so sneakily crept up to her, making sure that I was hidden. That piece of grass disguised me so well, I'm sure I blended in like a zebra in a stripes convention. Or she was too distracted to notice, but I like to think I'm just amazing. Pulling out my amazing ninja skill, I was about to whack her on the noggin when she turned around, grinning. She lunged at me with her spoon, but the power of my spork overcame her with its fork-like capabilities, and I whacked her arm. How she put away her phone and got her spoon out, I had no clue. Perhaps this goes with her weirdness today. Oh well, I won!

"Victory! Victory!" I ran in circles, chanting my battle cry.

"Ready to go?" Aww, she interrupted my chant. Oh yeah, we're leaving.

"Yep, let's go!"

And so we left. Making a quick stop at Selphie's to change; we raced to the beach where our boats were. I had changed into my black tank-top with a white one over top of it. I also wore a purple skort, just incase I need to go upside-down. I had my bracelets on my arms and wore a few necklaces as well. (Think of Kairi's outfit from the first game) Taking off my shoes, I hauled my boat to the water as Selphie came up.

She was in her short, sleeveless yellow dress. It looked almost like a pair of yellow overalls for a girl. And she was wearing sandals, meaning she was probably going to kick those off sometime. Or use them to hit me with, they were wooden, so it might hurt. On her wrist was a watch, the old kind with the hands that confuse me. It was a gift from her grandma or something, so she wears it all the time.

We shoved our boats off into the water and hopped in, splashing water around us. Then we were off, paddling as fast as we could in order to beat the other. I started laughing, we do this every time we go here and I already know who's going to win. I paddled as hard as I could, but somehow Selphie was always able to pass me. Where she gets all that upper arm strength from, I want to know. She probably practices rowing in her spare time or something. We came up close to Destiny Island, just as Selphie starts to speed up. She's like a machine, that girl is! We reach the island quickly, pulling our boats to shore away from the tide if it comes. I almost lost my raft once to the tide; it was a good thing Selphie noticed it. We had to run in the water to get it, me falling on my face, getting a mouthful of water.

"What do you want to do today?"

"I don't know, you're the one who told me we should come."

"Oh yeah, I wanted to show you something."

We walked over to the row of abandoned shacks, coming up to the pool of clear water. When we were little, we would use it as a drinking pond, because it was so cool and refreshing. We used to play mermaids, and swam there looking for sunken treasure. (aka some shells and shiny rocks) We would 'journey' all around the island, often lapping it in an attempt to satisfy our childish curiosity. This eventually helped my life later on, I joined the track team in High School and now I'm in the Varsity team. It's amazing how one thing leads to another like that.

We passed underneath the shade of the enormous trees that made up the center of the island, their leaves cloaking our footsteps. I looked around, seeing nothing that Selphie would have any interest in. She was leading us to a part of the rock that was covered in vines. Big, exciting, totally-better-than-swimming-in-the-nice-cool-water rock. My favorite.

"Selphie, why are we here?"

"I thought I saw something here the last time I came here, so I wanted you to come with me to check it out."

Then I saw it, the big foreboding cave with an evil I'm-gonna-kill-you-and-your-future-generations feeling. Being the rational person I am, I said the first thing I could think of.

"Are you kidding me? We'll die if we go in there!"

I mean, the place was practically screaming death, or my name is Sherrie. Which it's not.

Then she gave me the most pathetic, suck-up face I had ever seen, her eyes big and her lower lip trembling, even her hair seemed downcast. Why did she do that? It's cheating, that's what it is. And I'm going to one day figure out how to resist it…. Maybe.

"Fine, but if a cave troll comes and eats my brains; I want purple flowers in my memorial."

"Thanks Kairi!"

And so the two courageous young ladies boldly stepped where no man had gone before….Not! Okay, so Selphie bravely skipped in, but I on the other hand stayed to the side and slowly followed, using my keychain flashlight as a guide to not run face-first into the walls. Which was a bad idea, because I lost her. Like she ran off into the darkness and I don't hear her singing anymore lost, not just I can't see her lost. I shouted to her over and over again, threatening to drown her non-existent cat or to throw her down the stairs, once I found some. Then I heard it, a king of moaning sound coming from where I had been a little while ago. I looked back, and saw a light coming from far away; bobbing up and down, like it was hopping. Imagine that, stuck in an ominous cavern and being chased by a monster playing hopscotch. Joy.

I started sprinting then, going as fast as I could with only the flashlight guiding my way. I would occasionally stop and look over my shoulder to see if I had gotten away, but each time the light was there, bobbing up and down. Maybe it's a mutated Mexican jumping bean, just waiting to hop in my ear and take over my brain.

Now I had to admit, the prospect of being taken over by a food, at least I think it's a food, put me in a panic, I just started running straight, no longer able to scream, my throat was so dry. And I ran into a wall, perfect.

Staggering back, I cursed the very day the wall would dare get in my way, when I noticed that it wasn't actually a wall. It was a door, a big wooden door that you would see in old castles or haunted houses. But it looked sturdy, like someone took care that the wood wouldn't rot or anything. Raising my flashlight, I spied the trail of gold outlining the door, glinting as I held the light close. It was so weird; the way the door drew my attention, almost forcing my nose up against the wood in order to inspect it.

"Isn't it cool?" I heard Selphie say from behind me.

"Yeah"

Wait… Selphie? I turned around, about to scream at her or stab he with a fork, or something that I could come up with in the next two seconds when I noticed something odd about her. Not just regular wear-so-much-yellow-it-would-make-a-normal-person-ill odd, nor gravity-defying hair odd, she had both of those already. Now, I'm sure that this is probably normal for everyone, but it's a shock to me.

On top of Selphie's head was a pair of fluffy, white bunny ears. I admit I ogled at them for quite some time; my eyes would probably be falling out of my sockets if they could. I had known this girl for most of the life I remember, and I had never known. My best friend is secretly a jackolope! I always wanted to meet one of those. But wait, she doesn't have antlers. Darn. I mean, now I'm just going to say that my best frie… they just twitched! Like full on wagging back and forth then standing up straight on her head twitched! I'm going crazy… or crazier than I already was to begin with. I wonder if she ever sings "Do your ears hang low?"

I must have started humming that ridiculously addictive song, because Selphie was in my face, ears and all, and trying to shake the crazy out of me.

"Kairi! Kairi! Snap out of it! I'm sorry Kairi, I was going to explain as soon as you got here, but you got lost and started running once I found you again and hit the door and…"

"Heh heh, ears."

"Yes Kairi, ears. I was going to tell you, I'm not originally from Transverse Town, I'm actually from Wonderland."

That snapped me out of my stupor. Wonderland, wait I know that place from somewhere…

"Wait, Wonderland like Alice, the Queen of Hearts and all?"

"Yeah, that's where I lived until I was sent to find you."

"Wait, why would Wonderland want me?"

She looked down slowly, averting her eyes and scuffing her shoes in the dirt.

"I'm not aloud to tell you."

"Why not?"

"Because the White Rabbit is a meant as a guide, not an explainer of things."

"Meaning you don't want to explain. White Rabbit, huh, well that explains the ears. Got a pocket watch too?"

She seemed to brighten up at my acceptance of her new funny living hairpiece. She smiled widely, digging through that pocket on the front of her dress. Funny, I didn't even think that was a pocket, I thought it was just decoration.

"Right here!"

Out of the magical pocket she produced an old, gold watch, the kind with the cool cover that you have to click a button to open. I looked old, with the letters WR engraved in looping calligraphy on the front. It was beautiful, in its own antique way.

"This is so cool."

I reached out to touch it, the glint of the cover drawing me in. I was about to lay my fingers on it when Selphie pulled it back to her chest, like a little kid with a teddy bear.

"No time for that, no time for talk, it's time for you to leave."

"Leave where? You're in the way."

She wagged her finger in my face, grinning at my confusion. I felt a gust of coldness, wind I guess, and turned around to see the wooden doors wide open, a dark abyss beyond.

"It's off to Wonderland for you."

With that, she pushed me, and I stumbled through, loosing my balance and falling. I never said I was the most graceful person ever. I braced myself for impact, but I just fell through where I thought the floor was, and was sent tumbling until the darkness consumed me.

later

I don't know how long I have been falling, but I've grown bored of it. I had found a mysteriously floating rocking chair to sit in, which made me feel safer than just free-falling, let me tell you. Though, I don't like how it's rocking and floating at the same time, it sends shivers down my back each time and I feel like I'm going to fall out. I also found some toast and jam, which usually I never eat, but I figured it would have to do. It was delicious, by the way. All this random floating stuff is really getting on my nerves, it's so weird to see things floating without any walls or floors to support it's self on. I'm just waiting to see a crazy lady riding a bicycle to come floating by, but no cackling crones in sight. And now I'm bored again.

later later

Still floating gradually down. Still bored. What's new? Selphie should have warned me, I would have brought a book or my game boy or something. I think I'll take a nap now.

later later later

Okay, this trying-to-sleep-in-a-rocking-chair isn't working and I'm now tired and uncomfortable. I'm going to hurt that rabbit the next time I see her. That is if my face doesn't become a squished pancake on the floor once I get there. If I get there. Bored. I don't even care if I fall to my death anymore; just get me out of this place!

So much later that the author didn't want to write later anymore

I had finally gone to sleep when my chair abruptly stops and shoves me out of my seat, in which I had just gotten comfortable. Unluckily for me, that position was upside-down. I had hoped that at least the blood draining to my head would knock me out or make me so dizzy that I couldn't think, and it turned out to be so comfortable I just fell asleep with my legs hanging over the back and my head on the puffy seat cushion. But now I'm falling.

Wait…. I'm falling, which means I'm still going to splat into a pancake at the bottom. Crud. And so I did the most logical thing I could think of and started screaming.

"I don't want to die! I'm too young to die! I have a whole life to live and a rabbit to beat up! Noooooo!"

And that is how I ended up here; hanging upside-down from a mysterious hanging chandelier that I swear only appeared when my foot was in between its rungs. It doesn't hurt it's just annoying to be beaten by an inanimate object; at least I think it's inanimate, I'm not totally sure with this place, with the floating jam and all. And to make it worse, I'm not just a few feet from the ground, like I would hope. I'm actually quite a ways up, the furniture actually sitting on the ground looks smaller than I know it should be, and I stretched my fingers as far as they could go and didn't even come close to touching the floor.

Oh, and the figment of my imagination is here too, not to worry. As soon as I got stuck, he just appeared, with this stupid grin on his face. Now that was annoying.

"How's the weather up there?"

That's the first thing he said before cracking up. Which didn't help him to getting on my good side?

Unfortunately, his appearance does help him, which doesn't help me despise him. I noticed right away that he was about as old as me, if not only a little older, with the oddest spiky brown hair I had ever seen. I thought Selphie was bad, but this guy takes the metaphorical cake. It stood up in all directions, but didn't shine with gel or whatever else that people put in their hair to make it stick that straight. I mean, it looks like he could poke an eye out with that. But in a cute way. He was wearing back, hooded jacket unzipped to show off his well-muscled chest through the red tee-shirt underneath. He was also wearing a pair of baggy black pants with red lines going down the sides. On his feet were big yellow shoes. Yellow. Really, one would think that they wouldn't match, but they did.

But I have to admit that the things that caught my attention were his eyes. Guys shouldn't have eyes that pretty a color blue. They just seemed to suck you in. It's not fair! How can I hate this guy now?

"You done staring? I'm kind-of bored down here, so if you're going to fall, could you hurry?"

That's how. That's the bad thing about guys, they're nice to look at, just not talk to. Like the fish that sings every time you pass by, except at least the fish stays still.

"I don't want to fall, it's so far down!"

"You just have to land on your feet."

"Easy for you to say, you're on the ground."

"Here, I'll help you."

"Oh no, no imagination of mine is going to 'help' me down."

I decided that no guy would ever just appear out of nowhere, and that I must be dreaming still. Dang, which means I'm still falling. Anyway, I must just be dreaming this guy up because I've never had a boyfriend, and probably never will. That's it! I'm hallucinating a guy because of my sad life of sadness and gloom. I really am pathetic, I guess.

"I'm not your imagination."

"Sure, sure, and I'm not hanging from a chandelier, yes, we all wish that was true, but no."

There was no way I was going to let Hallucination Guy get to me. He was the fake one here, not me.

"I'll prove it."

"Sure you will, have fun with that."

And then I kind of zoned out of his "I'm a real boy" rant. I mean, he's got no way to prove himself, and I'm kind of hard of thinking, having been upside down for a while now. Maybe if I ignore him he'll go…

"Ouch!"

Something just pinched me, and I don't like it. Invisible crabs and all scare me. I opened my eyes to give those crabs a beating when I came eye to hair with my imagination. Let me tell you, his hair is about the softest hair I had ever felt. Now that's not fair.

"I'm not fake either."

He pinched me again, right on the arm. Okay, it hurt a little bit, and he's still here, so I guess he's not a depressed, single girl's hallucination. Shoot, now what am I going to do; he's sitting on that floating chair, looking so smug… Wait, he was just down there a minute ago.

"How'd you get here… floor… down there?"

"This is Wonderland; it's just how it is."

Now that doesn't seem to make sense, but neither does anything right now, so we'll go with it. Now, something that's been bugging me.

"What's your name?"

"Sora"

"Do all of you have a title, like Selphie is the White Rabbit?"

"Yeah"

"Who are you?"

"If you must know, it is your deepest pleasure to be speaking with the Mad Hatter."

Of course….

End Chapter

There, it's finished! Now I don't know how long it may take to write another chapter, but I will try since I'm making a resolution to finish this. (I have a habit of leaving things half done) Please tell me what you think of it! Thanks!

Happy-kat Hikara


	2. Talk to inanimate objects

Disclaimer: Still don't own anything, but Nothing is on my list to buy. That means, of course, that Kingdom Hearts, Alice in Wonderland, and everything else I mention I do not own. I also don't own Journey's song "Don't stop believing", sorry.

I'm so happy, people have been reviewing and I feel so special! I'm so happy people like it!

I'm soooo sorry! I'm slow and I know it. Life distracts me…

Lesson 2: Talk to inanimate objects

Okay, so let's recap. Went with Selphie to Destiny Island, fell down a door, which is possible, as I found out, got stuck on a chandelier, and met the Mad Hatter who is telling me that I am in Wonderland. Now how wonderful is that?

So I'm finally down from my place in the ceiling, if it is really a ceiling. The Mad Hatter seems to think it is, and low and behold, I look up at where I fell and there it is, a wall. Now how a ceiling mysteriously appeared, I don't know, but the fact is that my only way back to Destiny Island is covered up by it. And that stupid chandelier is still there, no way for me to cut it down now. Maybe that's really a mirage too, and I'm only imagining the red floral pattern wallpaper that separates me from escape. I mean, it has to be fake, who puts wallpaper on the ceiling? Exactly.

"I'm on to you." I turned around, facing my rival of hatred and such, and pointed a finger at him. He looked surprised too, like my crazy stare-at-the-ceiling phase was normal or something.

"This is all an elaborate mirage that you and Selphie came up with to taunt me with."

"Why would I do that? I don't even know you."

Hmmm… He got me there. Ah, I know!

"You're a stalker!"

At this point, his eyes popped out of his head, but regrettably, he didn't die. I was really hoping he would. He stopped and smiled the kind of evil smile that makes you want to back away slowly. Then he walked up to me, and practically screamed in my face. He sure can be loud if he wants to.

"A stalker?!? Why would I stalk you?"

Ouch, that hurt my ears a little bit. Well, if he's gonna yell, then so shall I.

"How else would you know I would be stuck to a chandelier after falling from a giant door into a hole?"

"We were expecting you."

"Exactly, you and your little friends teamed up with Selphie to stalk me!"

He didn't say anything more for a while, most likely figuring that I'm too stubborn to listen to any type of reason he tries to throw at me. Ha! Take that logic. I don't need you no more! I can figure out this thing on my own… maybe.

"You gonna stand there looking dumb or come with me?"

Wait. He thinks that after all that's happened in the last fifteen minutes or how long, that I'm going to just go along with this and be all la-di-da about it, then he's mistaken. No siree. If that's even a word. So I proceeded to do exactly the opposite of what He wanted (I refuse to say his name) and sat on the ground. Which was actually quite nice, not cold and hard like most floors, but slightly cushy and cool, not freeze-your-butt-off cold. I hate those floors. And it was clean too, like I-can-eat-off-this clean. Pretty snazzy if you ask me.

I most likely looked like one of those little four year olds in the supermarket sitting on the ground and crying because they want candy. I had my arms crossed, and I gave him a defiant look every time he looked over at me. Take that! I ain't going anywhere, ha!

Look at that, he's getting mad. No, wait, he's already mad, technically, so he's getting angry. Heh, that's kinda funny. I can make a joke if I want to. I should start my own show. The Kairi show about Stupid people. Yeah, that would be fun. I could… wait, he's looking suspicious. And he's taking out his hat, what's he gonna do, beat me with it? Wait, where'd a green hat come from? Whatever.

"Fine." He kinda is shouting, "I'll make you come with me."

I feel like he's one of those guys who offers little kids candy from their van and if they don't come willingly, they grab the kid and speed off. It's probably because I'm acting like a little kid. Oh no, what if he takes me in his van to Tibecquador and holds me hostage while he takes over the world with his army of evil zombie cantaloupe!

"The cantaloupe! Noooo!" I shout, my hands up in disbelief. They were my friends, and they betray me. How could they.

Oh well, has he even noticed my shout of agony? If I'm a little kid, I want someone to notice my tantrum. Let's see, what's he doing? He's got his hat off, and he's poking it. I held up my imaginary microphone and was about to commentate out loud, but I'm a crazy-cool spy and I'll do it secretly and silently. Mwa Ha.

And now he's, ummm, he's kind-of, talking into his hat. He's speaking in a soft voice, so I can't hear what he is saying, but I have a feeling it's about me, with the way he's glaring at me every once in a while. It's one of those I'm-gonna-defenstrate-you-in-your-sleep kind of glares. I don't want to die, and being thrown out of a window just isn't the way I want to go, so I must do something.

Think Think Think.

Hey, if it worked for Winnie the Pooh, then it should work for me.

Think Think ah ha! My totally logical mind has got it. I stood up and he-who-shall-not-be-named looked my direction. Probably hoping that I'll come with him. Well too bad. I smiled at him from across the room and…

…ran as fast as I could to the nearest open thing that I hoped wasn't another evil door of falling paranoia. Jumping into the dark, literally, I landed on the ground again and sprinted as fast as I could go. Did I mention that I sprint for track? Well I'm pretty freaking good at it. I was going a mile a minute, and I was loving it.

From behind me I hear the faint sound of my name being called, but I ignored it, the thrill of running having caught hold of me and was whispering to me to go faster, longer, just more. It felt amazing. I closed my eyes and imagined myself running through the sand, the waves blowing a mist of water onto my legs as I ran after Selphie. We're laughing together, and I think there's a giant purple crab in the background. Yeah, that's defiantly normal. Oh well, I'm happy and running and…

"Oomph!"

I defiantly ran into a door. No wait, it's a wall, but there's a door right next to me. It's made of the same wood as the evil door of hurtful falling, but not. And, to make it all better, there's a person attached to it. Not the weird doorknob face like with Alice, but an actual body, well person in a creepy cloak, with the hood pulled over. It's kind of like half of him... her... them is inside the door, and the person's upper body is sticking out.

This is kind-of creepy, I think I'm going to just turn the other way and...

"This world has been connected."

What the heck is he babbling about? He being the manly voice coming from the hood. Is something actually alive there? Maybe it's a weird machine with a voice box. And what does he mean 'This world is connected?' Of course it's connected, I got here, didn't I? How would I be here right now if my Earth, oh how I miss you dearly, wasn't stuck to this nut-job of a world? I would be away from crazy talking doors and Mad Hatters that talk into their hats and my best friend would not be a rabbit. Heck, I would still be on the beach, watching the sun set or whatever. Not in a dimly lit hallway with wallpapered ceilings and scary dark corners.

"You do not yet know what lies beyond the door."

Well he's awful frustrating… I don't need to know, now do I? I don't need to know anything about this stupid door in this insane world. All I need to learn is the way out, and then I'll be fine. I'm just going to turn around again and walk away. Actually, I'll probably run away, and if I run into either Selphie or the Hatter, I'll strangle the way out of them, that or find a pointy object to impale them with. Heh heh, pointy, heh.

"There is so very much to learn, you understand so little."

"Whaaaa??" Did he just say that? It's like he read my mind, then figured out a way to insult my thoughts. I can strangle things if I want to, door, and there's nothing you can do about it. That's right, I know you're hearing this, and I want you to know that, if I wanted to, I can read minds too!

"A meaningless effort."

"You don't even know me, how dare you just start going on about doors and me being stupid. If I want to read minds I will! I should smack you right in your face, you two-faced son of a jackal!"

Heh, I got that insult from Aladdin! This guy is crazy. If I wanted too, I could smack the hood right off his face, and there's nothing he could do about it because he is inside of the door! I walked right up to him, intending to make nasty insults or make fun of his dress. Or maybe a Your Mom joke. I got one!

"Your Mom was firewood! Ha, take that, you stupid door!"

"One who knows nothing can understand nothing."

I got right in his face, hood, whatever and jabbed at his coat. This is crazy, who goes about and randomly insults everyone who runs by them. It's not my fault I hit that wall!

"Are you callin' me stupid? Let me tell you, Mister... hey, where do you think you're going?"

He started to kinda shrink into the door, already more than half of his torso had disappeared into the door, and even more was disappearing before my eyes. Now, I'm a little mad at him already, but to have him disappear on me while I'm busy insulting him! That's just bad manners.

I grabbed a hold of a part of his cloak, trying to drag him back to this side of the door.

"I'm not done with you yet, don't disappear on me!"

I pulled harder, but my feet still dragged on the ground, making a loud squealing noise. What, is he attached to some heavy machinery or something?

"What are you doing?"

My arm is being sucked into the door? Wherever it's going, it's cold. I tried letting go, but the door had me tight. Now it's going for my elbow!

"Hey! I need that! Let go!"

I have to admit, with my arm being swallowed, I didn't even care that I was yelling at a door. By now the entire scary hooded person is gone, and so is my elbow. So I did as all logically thinking humans do. With a wild "Hyah!" I went to kick the door. Don't even ask why, I just thought it would work. And you know what happened. I got stuck. My hand and my foot stuck in a door. It made a loud squishing sound as I tried to kick it, so now I feel like Briar Rabbit stuck to the tar baby or whatever it was. Let me tell you, it sucks.

"Need some help?"

Oh great, just what I needed. The Hatter found me. He's grinning again, which doesn't make me happy. He's got his hand on his hip, the other in his pocket. His gosh darn hat is sitting atop his stupid hair, how I don't know, and that just made me mad. And now I feel stupid being balanced on one foot while a door is sucking me up into its nasty coldness.

"Don't you have someone else to stalk?" I asked, trying to look as dignified as I could while twisting around to look at him while simultaneously tugging on my stuck limbs.

"No, just you."

"Tea to drink, songs to sing?"

His smirk widened again and I knew I was in for it.

"Just a small town girl"

Oh no, not this again. I had to put up with kids belting this at school, and I don't need any more of it.

"Livin' in a lonely world"

Not that I have anything against this song, I actually like Journey, but the Hatter can't sing. At all. Really, he's practically screeching it.

"She took a midnight train"

Okay, so it's not that bad, but I will say it is and hate him all the more for it. Stupid singer mad thing.

"Goin' anywhere"

Luckily for me, those were the last words I heard before the door swallowed me whole. Well, I actually thought I heard the distinctive; "Oh Shh..." which is probably when he figured out that he had lost me to the man-eating door. Let's hope he meant shitake mushrooms. Yum wouldn't mind having some of those… What can I say, I'll eat a horse right now, I'm so hungry

Now that I've lost my stalker, I can figure out where the heck I am. It's dark, and though I try and try, my feet can't seem to touch any ground at all. Aaannnddd….. that's about all I can see.

No, wait… that's a chair. And look, there's a table right next to it! Man, I'm so good at this finding things thing. Over there is a picture frame and a vase of flowers and… no floor.

"Not again!" I screamed as I started my fall back down to the ground.

Suddenly I was startled to a stop as a chair caught my fall and lowered me down to the floor. It felt like one of those rides where they take you up really, really high and then drop ya. Seconds before you get to becoming one with the nasty gum and soda stains on the ground, they stop and lower you safely to the ground. It felt like that. And I felt just as nauseous as whenever Selphie dragged me on those rides. My stomach.

"Hello?"

I know, seeing if someone is around isn't the smartest thing, but it's dark and I really don't want to be alone. Maybe someone other than the Hatter though, I'm not that lonely.

"Is anyone there?"

I circled around, squinting to find something, when I came nose to hood with the weird door.

"Oh no, not you again! Do you want me to taunt you again?"

I got as close as I could to his sick-looking wooden face, with his black-painted hood and carved mouth, and realized something. He's not spewing any kind of scary join-us-or-die odd sentences of doom. He's not spewing anything at all. Not even an evil giggle, which isn't manly but I think he's the kind of person to do such a thing.

Another little note. He's not moving. Not a rustle of his cloak or the rise and fall of breath from his body. Which is odd. Why the heck would this person not be breathing? Maybe he's choking!

"Hold on weird door!"

I tried banging on his chest, forcing the air back into his lungs, when I noticed something else… He's wood. No, wait, I noticed this about thirty seconds ago, it just didn't click. The stupid door turned to wood. Of course, it would turn to wood, it's a door. Stupid door.

I know I shouldn't have, but I got curious. What really is behind that door when you're not going straight through it? I pulled the arm of scary-cloak-guy-who's-actually-wood and the door practically opened it's self.

Stepping through, I found myself right in front of a strange little house with weird piping noises coming from the back.

"Now what could that be?"

Of course, it could be someone to help me home! I looked around and noticed a side door right to the left of me. I stepped through and walked around the oddly bright colored house to see a large table with a duck and a weird wolf thing sitting at it drinking tea.

"Why Kairi, won't you join us for tea?" A voice called from behind me.

And there was the Hatter, standing behind me with a stupid smug grin and a pot of tea. Joy.

End chapter

Ha! Got this done before I go on vacation! I had to rush to finish, but that's one chapter down! Oh, thanks everyone who reviewed, it made me all special and junk!


	3. Butter your truth with a bit of insanity

Disclaimer: Though I do own my very own mind, all Kingdom Hearts, Alice in Wonderland, or anything else I may forget isn't mine.

Sorry I'm so slow; I would blame life if I didn't know it was procrastination's fault.

Lesson 3: Butter your truth with a bit of insanity

Oh joy, I just walked into the tea party of one not-to-be-mentioned Mad Hatter and his group of mental animals. Now that I look at them, they're not even the right animals!

Sitting on the table napping was an odd looking white duck in a blue suit, or at least the top part of a suit. He's wearing a weird looking hat that seems to defy gravity, not unlike his friend's hair, and has a zipper going down it. What's he gonna do, unzip it when he gets done eating and use it as a napkin? It's poofy. Really, that's all I can think of to describe it, it's so oddly shaped. He seems to be napping, like sleeping on a table surrounded by whistling tea pots is normal. Not that the whistling is bad, it actually makes a nice tune, but it is quite loud and I don't think I would be able to sleep even if I hadn't slept in weeks. But, there he is, snoring away in this curled-up ball, nestled between the jam and the pot of sugar.

Now his companion was some kind of wolf/dog thing sitting in one of the twenty some chairs placed around the table. He was one of those skinny-looking guys that you know is going to just loom over you they're so tall. Not unlike his friend, he's also wearing a poofy hat-thing, but this one's orange. Which totally matches the black jacket, bright green turtle-neck, and yellow pants the guy also has on. Is this guy color blind or what? I mean, it's alright to experiment with color a little, but when it all doesn't go at the same time, it just looks weird… or maybe I just enjoy matching and the folk in Wonderland don't. Wait, the duck matches, kind of, and besides the hat, the Hatter could plausibly match as well. Well, he must be the odd-ball…

"Sora, you never tol' us you were invitin' a gurl over! I'd 'ave put on my ears if ya'd just tol' me." That was the tall guy, in an accent that could be called stupid-sounding if I could actually think straight.

Then he reaches into his back pocket, and after some fishing and some, "nope, nope, not that"s, he pulls a long pair of rabbit ears and just plops them on his head. Like that's the normal thing to do when one is expecting company!

I look over and the sleeping duck has managed to fit on two enormous mouse ears, which look hilarious with his hat and his bill. Now what I wonder is if the duck is really asleep, or just pretending. Maybe if I poked it, it would wake up.

I inched up to the sleeping duck when a gloved hand pulled me by the arm into a block of green turtleneck. It was the creature with the rabbit ears, trying to suffocate me! I struggled to get out of his hold as he swung me around, hollering.

"Gorsh, I never though' I'd see tha day. Our own lil gurl's gone and come 'ome! Yahoohoohoo!"

I was going light headed, the whole world is spinning, I know it! Finally, after the wind was knocked out of me enough, the guy let me down. He looked me over for a second, which I probably would have done before I hugged a compete stranger, and nodded. What, did I pass a test? Then he gave me the widest smile I had ever seen and took my hand in his, shaking it vigorously.

"Uh hyeck, sorry 'bout that miss, I jus' got so excited I couldn't help myself. Let me introduce ya ta me. I'm the March Hare, but you can call me Goofy."

Goofy? What kind of name is that? What, did his mother take one look at his face and decide, "His face looks so goofy… that's what we should call him!" I almost feel sorry for the guy, but then again, he is friends with the Hatter, or so I believe, so I don't really feel that bad at all. Oh, wait, he's talking again, this might be intelligent... or at least helpful.

"An' this is the Dormouse, but we all call 'im Donald fer short. Don't you worry about 'im, he'll probably stay asleep the whole time, so ya won't 'ave ta introduce yerself twice."

So, not the information that I wanted, but good enough. Goofy seems to be a simple fellow, but he may be able to explain this wacky world to me, unlike a certain friend of mine.

"Now that introductions are over, can we sit down for some tea? I'm starving!"

I had almost forgot about him, which was very nice indeed, until he had to pipe up in his annoying voice and interrupt my thoughts of strangling a that rabbit friend of mine. I glared in the Hatter's direction, clearly showing my vast hatred for him, but he just grinned and plopped down in a chair at the head of the long table. Taking a long sip from the cup he just happened to find sitting around, he attempted to hide his grin behind the saucer, but I saw it.

I glared some more, until I realized that: 1. I was acting really stupid and childish, and 2. Goofy was looking at me weird. I decided that Goofy might actually help me, and he actually does seem like a nice fellow, even if he doesn't know how to put on matching clothes. I put on the nicest, most sincere smile I could come up to, and sat down next to Goofy, not even acknowledging the thing that was sitting, still grinning, on the other side.

"So, Goofy, why am I here, exactly?"

"Gorsh, yer the Princess, don't ya know, yer jus' commin' home!"

Well beat me with a stick! That explains everything! Not.

Princess! I'm not even from here, and he's loony enough to say I'm a princess of this wacky Wonderland, which isn't very wonderful, so they should change the name to something closer to the real identity… like Crazy land or The Special Place Where Special and Slightly Insane Characters Dress Up and Be Special. I can see the ads now, "Come to TSPWSASICDUABS! You'll have so much fun, you'll just go crazy!" And I don't live here; I live with my adopted parents and their unborn baby, not here, anywhere but here.

"I'm going insane!"

I think I screamed it, but I don't care. I've lost it, this isn't real, and I'm actually passed out in some hospital in a coma somewhere dreaming this all up. This must be a dream, it can't be real. I must have… tripped in the sand while I was running with Selphie, and hit a rock, or maybe a turtle, and collapsed. Then Selphie, without bunny ears, swiftly took me to the nearest hospital where she is waiting patiently for me to wake up. That sounds just about right.

"Ow!"

He pinched me! While I was happily zoning out about hospitals, that stupid Hatter pinched me!

"Wake up! This is important and we need you listening if we're ever going to get your throne back."

Wait… What? Get my throne back, when did they say that? Oh, were they talking while I was zoning? I do that a lot, just think and stare off into space and not really hear anything that's…

"Hey! Stop pinching me!"

He did it again! He's just standing behind my chair, just waiting for me to zone out again so he can inflict harm upon my person!

"Listen, will you! This is important, and we wouldn't have sent Selphie to your world so long if we weren't going to use you to save the kingdom."

"Excuse me? I definitely don't need any of this right now. Selphie is my friend because she likes me for me, and I've never been here before, so how could I 'save the kingdom' or whatever? And if I am the Princess, should you really be irritating your royalty by pinching them?"

Now Goofy's looking at me with sympathy, like he knows something I don't about me. I hate those looks.

"Kairi," He took my hands in his, which almost feels like a father comforting his daughter. I feel really safe.

"Kairi, yer the Princess, the Princess of Hearts, who went missin' six years ago."

"But I was found in an abandoned neighborhood somewhere in Traverse Town by a local volunteer fireman when they found the houses on that street suddenly on fire."

"That's only what they want you to believe," the Hatter interjected, "They probably planted those memories and hid your memories of how you really came there, and the ones of Wonderland, so that you wouldn't try to come back."

"You were kidnapped, Kairi, by them nasty Spades an' their 'Wonderful' Queen, Maleficent."

That's my mother's name, why is her name the same as that Queen's name? I'm so confused!

"How do you know my Mother?"

"Your Mother!"

Wow, Donald woke up to that. He just jumped up like he had been awake the whole time. But now that he is up, maybe he can answer some questions. Goofy's nice and all, but his slang is a little difficult to comprehend.

Or not. The Duck is now standing on top of the table, screeching something at the top of his lungs. Fish paste, no… cheesecake? He's spitting all over the place, and even if he wasn't shouting, I don't think I would be able to understand him anyway. Why can't people talk normal here?

"Bang!"

And… now he's asleep again. He just fell onto the table and passed out. Wow, he already curled in a ball and everything. I wish I could fall asleep that fast.

I leaned closer to Goofy and whispered, "Hey, what was he saying. Did he even say anything at all?"

"He jus' was a'sayin' that Maleficent must 'ave stolen you an' made you her daughter so ya wouldn' be able to run away once you got yer memories back. Aheuck!"

"What memories?"

"Of Wonderland!"

Wow, didn't remember that the Hatter was right behind me. Did he really not move? That's creepy. One would think that he would have sat back down in his chair at the head of the table like he was before he got up, not staring down at me while I discussed translations with Goofy.

Another thing, why is his face so close? After his outburst, his face is like inches from mine. Now normally I don't mind having a cute looking guy with gorgeous eyes inches from my face, but this guy is kind-of creepy, and it looks like he's searching for… something… in my eyes. Go away scary face, shoo!

"Of the times that you would run around the Tulgy woods even though the King didn't want you there without a guard. Or when you ate and entire "eat me" cookie and your size didn't go back to normal for a week. Or…"

"Listen, I don't remember running through woods here, or having guards, or even changing sizes. I've lived my life, or all of it that I can remember, with my Stepparents, only growing because I got older, thank you very much. They told me that I must have lost my memories of my first ten years due to the shock of almost being burned alive. See, I have a burn mark to prove it."

I lifted my shirt just a little to show the red mark that still showed on my side. It was small, to tell you the truth, it was just a tiny line of red. But a burn is a burn.

"Apparently I fell onto a burning piece of lumber as I was trying to run out, or that's what the paramedics told me when they gave me a check-up the week after I was rescued, they said it was a miracle that I got out as well as I did."

"This isn't from a flaming stick!" the Hatter cried out as he prodded my side with his finger. And let me tell you, I don't appreciate strange people that I have deemed as creepy to poke me anywhere, especially not on my skin.

"It is so a burn!"

"Never said it wasn't, I just am saying that you got this when you ran into a boiling pot of the Griffin's soup a few days before you disappeared."

"Even if I did, as you want me to believe, live in Wonderland for the first ten years of my life, how would you know how I got burned?"

"I was there!"

"Oh, so you were stalking me even before I came and 'lost my memory,' is that it?"

"No!"

"Then why were there?"

Little did I know that poor Goofy was sitting in his chair, mouth open to get a word in, and hand up to try to interject.

"I was just there, okay?"

"No, it isn't okay! Why were you there? Stalker."

"Fine! Be that way, see if I care!" He screamed in my face, then turned corner and ran off into the little house off the corner of the tea party. All in all, he ran off rather childishly, even slamming the door when he got there. I can imagine him just stomping around in circles, steam pouring out of his ears.

"What's his problem?"

"Well gorsh Kairi, you an' 'im used to be the bestest of friends. Practically inseparable. Why, he was miserable when you turned up missin'."

No way. No stinkin' way were me and that loon friends. Now I know this is all a dream and I'll wake up from my coma. Any time is a great time, Selphie. I'm dreaming. I'm dreaming. I'm dreaming…

"Why, of course you're not dreaming"

Okay, creepy mind-reading voices from the big, dark trees are where I draw the line. Well, my line has already been crossed, but this is like five-and-a-half steps over the line and waist-high in the water. Please, wake up Kairi.

"Why Princess of Hearts, we've been anticipating your return for quite some time. The Kingdom has waited six years for your return, and, if I may say so, Wonderland is quite mad about you."

"Wonderland can be mad without me, thank-you very much. After all, you have a conceited Hatter that has mad enough for at least a country. Add in Goofy and the Duck, and all of Wonderland can be covered."

"Quite a witty one, aren't you" The figure said.

I heard a thump, then the steps of shoes approaching me from behind. But when I turned, all I could see was some footprints in the dust and some manic chuckling in my face.

"Who are you?" I questioned as I began to back away.

"Why Kairi, don't you remember me? It's Riku, your friendly Cheshire cat."

And all of a sudden, a face appeared where there was only air, starting with these striking aqua eyes that seemed to be laughing at me with a secret joke. Next came up a smirking mouth and pale skin, framed with a mess of silver hair. Who has silver hair, you ask? Well, it was too light to be blonde, but not pure white, exactly. To top it all off, a pair of pink ears are stuck on his head. Does everyone here have to get themselves animal-themed accessories? Maybe I should grab some leaves and pretend I'm a tree?

And so there's a face floating in front of me, just hovering there, laughing to his own silent secret. My face isn't that funny that floating heads come and chuckle at it, is it?

He's stopped his chuckling, probably because he noticed that I'm still looking for the rest of his body to appear before I can believe that there's a person standing in front of me.

"Sorry about that." He states, and in a flash, the rest of him appears.

Let me tell you, the rest of him is still weird. Now his face does look a little bit feminine, but wearing a skin-tight, sleeveless yellow and black shirt-thing definitely proves that he knows he's good-looking. I mean, if you're gonna wear something tight; at least have a body to show off. But I guess he's not too proud of his legs, because he is wearing a pair of jeans with another pair of balloon-looking pants that attach with a strap to the top of his jeans and tie off at his ankles.

But I'd have to say the weirdest thing about his outfit was the large pink-and-purple striped tail that was swishing back and forth behind him. I mean, this just proves that everyone here is colorblind, because this guy is combining just about every color he can think of in his ensemble.

"Now do you remember me Kairi? Though I do recall you used to love when I surprised you before, I can see that you've changed while in that world of yours."

Okay, put aside the fact that this guy shouldn't dress himself in the morning, he isn't that bad. I mean, he's still creepy, but he seems to know what I'm going through, and does look like he's going to help.

"Why am I here?" I asked Riku. It seems that Goofy left when Riku came to talk to the Hatter, console him or whatever he needs. Probably has the tea and jam all ready.

"It all starts like this…" pulling out a large book from his sleeve and adjusting his newly acquired glasses, Riku turned to what seemed like a random page somewhere in the middle of the book and began.

"You were born …"

End Chapter

Well that took longer than I thought it would. I'm so bad with procrastination, but I'm trying to remain dedicated. Look! I found a bad guy and everything!

Happy-kat Hikara


	4. Sprinkle some Deja vu on your amnesia

Disclaimer: Still own nothing. No Disney, nothing of Lewis Carroll, no Kingdom Hearts.

Thanks for all the reviews, they're so encouraging!

Lesson 4: Sprinkle some Deja vu on your amnesia

"So let me get this straight, I'm the princess of Hearts, and I was stolen by the Queen of Spades so that she can take over all of Wonderland. The King and Queen are in hiding, but everyone knows that they're in the castle somewhere. And my favorite food really isn't peanut butter. I knew they were lying to me about that! But what does kidnapping me do for any bad guy?"

I feel like I just got stuck right into a video game. Except I have no weapons and no one is helping me. At all. I mean, Riku is the only one who tells me things that I can understand, not that Goofy wasn't trying, but it's just so difficult to understand him.

"If the Queen has you, then there is no heir."

"And that means what?"

"What happens when there's not a defined ruler in a kingdom?"

"Mass chaos that results in someone's head being chopped off?"

So he gave me a funny look for that, but I'm pretty sure that Europe had a problem with decapitation. Maybe that was just during the French Revolution…

"Close enough. So if the heir went missing some while ago, what will the kingdom do if their beloved King and Queen meet with an unfortunate turn of events?"

"You mean they 'accidentally'" I made sure to make quotation marks with my fingers for that, "managed to fall off a cliff or something?"

"Or ran into a spear. Or drank some tea laced with poisoned mushroom. But yeah, died in something unfortunate that wouldn't be traced back to Maleficent."

And he thought decapitation was weird. I thought Wonderland was full of "Off with your/her/his head!"s. He definitely just came up with two ways to kill someone and spouted it off like it was nothing. Now I have to wonder what is really wrong with him. I mean, he's mad too, I guess he just hides it better. Besides the ears and tail and that creepy entrance and the way he says weird things in a creepy voice and… okay so he is crazy and it shows, but at least he's something to look at.

"So the royal family is going to be knocked off so that Maleficent can take over when the country needs a leader, so that she won't have an entire country's resentment when she starts her reign?"

"What are they teaching you in that school, rubbish? Why would Maleficent care about a country's resentment? I mean, it would only get a little blood on its grass, nothing big enough to get mad about. It's the people's resentment she has to worry about."

Is he dumb? I definitely just said that. Or did he just imply that the land it's self is alive? Now that I think about it, with all the talking doors and changing ceilings, it's no wonder that the ground doesn't just pop up for tea and cookies right now. Better not say anything, just incase there are some trees that just happen to need introduction.

"And why should I care now? I'm back, so I can go in, tell the monarchy that I'm here, then go back home."

"What?"

He's got the scariest face on, like he'd eaten something rotten and molding. Only, I know he's making that face because of that suggestion I just made. Shoot, I knew it, he's insulted. There goes the only person who could help me, and that's the second person I've offended today, three if you count the door, but that thing had it coming.

"Why Princess, you can't ever say you're going back! It's your destiny to defeat Maleficent and restore madness around Wonderland when you rule as Queen!"

Wow, that's some destiny that's been dumped on my head. And what if I don't want to beat up the woman I've been thinking of as my mother for the past couple of years of my life. And Queen… what!

"Queen! I can't be Queen! I can barely talk in front of a class of thirty, let alone tell hundreds of people what to do and be a figure-head and all of that!"

I hate crowds. I've never been a public speaker, nor had I ever wanted a job where I made lots of decisions. I was hoping to get a career in track, or maybe being a secretary or something easy like that.

"Technically, it's mostly cards you give orders to."

"But Queen?" I screeched, pulling at my hair. This is too much. I collapse in a chair, put my face in my hands, and start crying.

I think I'm being too dramatic, but I'm so out of it that I don't care. I don't care if I'm sobbing with a mess of tears and red faces all in front of a good-looking guy. I can't take any more surprises about my supposed life or what I'm 'destined' for or anything else. I just want to go home and eat some depression food. Like ice-cream, or maybe even pie. I don't even think this is a dream anymore, because I know I can change my dreams, and they're not changing now.

I inhale sharply as I feel an arm encircle my shoulders and feel the warmth of Riku's body as he hugged me. And let me tell you, it feels awfully good. I'm beginning to really like this guy; he makes me feel all warm and comfy. He's distracting me from this mess I'm up against… and I love it.

"Kairi, it's not going to be as hard as you're imagining. I'll be there for you every step of the way; I'll even beat down your adoring fans when they crowd around you to see their Queen."

Now that's sweet. I've never had someone say that to me before, well, I've never heard of me having adoring fans either, but my crying turned into soft hiccups, which are slightly cuter than tears will ever be. He's looking at me with those gorgeous eyes; I just want to stay here, staring at his eyes forever.

I know, I know. Kairi, you've only know this guy for about an hour or two, there's no way you could have a crush on him already, but I do! I mean, he's good looking, the ears just make him cuter, and he's been kind to me and took the time to explain things to me properly, unlike some missing rabbits did. And he doesn't make fun of me either, like the Hatter hasn't stopped doing. Not that the Hatter's cute or anything, I would never even think of it… okay his eyes are… but wait… no more thinking brain, focus on Riku!

It's kind-of odd, but I feel like I've known him for longer then just this time that I've come here. If he is right, then maybe when I used to live in Wonderland I was friends with him. Maybe my crush is a roll-over feeling that I regained when my memories were sucked out of my brain or whatever they did to me.

"Riku, were we friends when I was living here?"

He hasn't let go! This is fabulous! I would think I was fanaticizing if I didn't know my face was a mess. In my fantasies, I always look amazing.

"Yeah, you, me and Sora were the best of friends back then. We did so much together, people used to joke that we were like one kid in three bodies. Like, we did everything, wrestled, built forts, camped out in the Tulgy woods. Those were the days."

I'm not exactly happy about the mention of the Hatter, who I refuse to recognize as anything else, and the fact that it sounds like I was just 'one of the guys.' How am I supposed to get him to see the cute and pretty girl that is totally single and sitting right next to him when he sees me as 'one of the guys.' Roar!

"You've really grown these last six years." He comments, pulling away. No! My warmth! Wait, is that comment supposed to be an insult? Is he saying I'm fat? Did he pull away because he was repulsed by my sobbing? Will he not talk to me because I'm old? I think he notices I was glaring at me suspiciously because he added, "In a good way, of course."

That's better.

"So Kairi, are you ready to head off to the castle?"

"The castle. That sounds exciting. Now what will we be doing in the castle?"

Whatever is in the castle must be more fun than here. And I'll be with Riku… I think I might become somewhat of a stalker. Of course, that's how I am with all my crushes… Wait, no getting distracted! And my face is still nasty from bawling!

"You're going to get your memories back so that we can face Maleficent."

"How is being in a castle going to help?" I thought Maleficent had those things, not some castle… unless the castle ate them like the door ate me. "Are they in a box or something?"

He started laughing, not like his mad chuckling from before, but honest laughter that makes me almost want to laugh with him. Except he's laughing at me, which is not a positive thing. No, laughing at one's self is not something I should do.

"I'm sure something in the castle will trigger your memories, we'll just walk around until you find them."

"Alright, let's go." Okay, so the whole walking around with Riku thing doesn't make me happy too.

"She can't go there yet!" I heard from inside the house. And low and behold, out pops the Hatter, with Goofy by his side, bounding over and waving his hands around like a mad man. Which he is, so it suits him perfectly. He looks kind of nervous, like he really doesn't want me to go to the castle.

"I can't go there why? I thought I lived there."

"Riku, don't bring her there." He's ignoring me and pleading with him. He's got a good face for begging, his eyes get all big and he looks almost ready to pout. His eyes would make a fuzzy animal that much cuter, not that I'm looking at his eyes or anything.

"She needs her memories as soon as she can get them to combat the Queen."

Way to go Riku, you tell him!

"But she's not ready yet, her memories are filled with insanity. Too much too quickly may prove to be too much."

He's desperate. Maybe he just doesn't want me to go there because he's hiding something in the castle. Or he doesn't want me to remember something embarrassing about himself, like what he did when he was four or something.

And… they went off into a secret huddle on the other side of the table, even the duck woke up to be in on it. And here I am, in this odd green and pink striped chair, looking over and feeling like a looser. Which I am because I know they're talking about me. They keep looking over at me, and Riku and Goofy have the decency to smile at my questioning look, but the Hatter just glares and Donald… well… he just looks like a mix of tired and angry, which I am beginning to think is one of his only expressions.

Time for some more commentary. Well, there's some heated whispering going on over there, with the waving of hands and shaking of fists. Riku seems to be listing off something, as he is counting on his fingers, of which the Hatter counters with a wild poke in the chest. Goofy is looking bewildered, watching the two with wide eyes and mouth half open, while Donald seems to be shouting something that no one is listening to.

Oh, it seems they're going to fight it out. Riku and the Hatter have both made a fist and… and… it's a stand-still. They glare at each other as their fists shake in anticipation and… Go! Riku puts down a rock, but is countered by Sora's paper. And that's the end of it.

"Fine, you win." No, don't give up that easily! He turns to me, "Kairi, we're going to be heading off to visit some people before we visit the castle."

"Are they coming with us?"

Please say no. Please say no.

"Well, gorsh, we'd love ta, Princess, but there's so much we've got ta do, findin' sum more tea an' all." Yes! "But don't ya worry, you've got Riku an' Sora ta come with ya!"

No! It all was going good until that last sentence. Why does he have to come?

"Kairi."

Ah! What's he doing so close to me again! I wasn't thinking that much!

"Kairi, if we're going to go, you have to do something for me."

"Why would I do that?"

I looked over at Riku for some help, but he was having an animated conversation with Goofy and Donald.

"Kairi, I don't think we got off on the right foot."

"What foot? I was hanging on the ceiling!"

He's running his hand through his hair and glaring at me. Good, I don't like you either.

"Look. I know you don't know me now, but we used to be best friends! I just want us to be friends again. Or at least on civil terms with each other."

"Why?"

He looks away bashfully, and then mumbled something I couldn't here.

"What?"

"I missed you."

Awww, that's cute. Let's see, friends with the Hatter means being closer to Riku, which I like. And he looks so pathetically cute right now, I can't help it.

"Fine Hatter, we can be friends."

I stuck out my hand to shake his, and he grabbed it with his gloved one. After a nice shake, he held on, staring at my face.

"Kairi, will you do one thing for me? Call me Sora, will ya?"

"Sure… Sora. We're friends, aren't we?"

His eyes lit up and he started grinning. What? I didn't do anything special. Then, without warning, he sprang. I was enveloped in a bear-hug within seconds, with the air being squeezed out of my being and his cheek pressed up against my hair. I don't think I realized that he was tall enough to do that, I thought he was my height.

"Hey, you two coming? Or are you going to stay like that all day?"

Sora looked up at Riku with a glare.

"So what if we are?"

Okay, that's too far. Blushing I pulled out of his arms and took a few steps away, just in case he was going to attack again.

"Let's get moving, shall we."

Please, let's leave and forget that Sora said that to my newly discovered crush.

"Right. So we're off to go see the Caterpillar."

"What?"

"The Caterpillar should know how to put back Kairi's memories."

Put back? Are we going to unscrew my head and dump them back in? I didn't know it was that complicated to get memories back.

"Sora," Riku interrupted my thoughts, "Leon moved last month, and he didn't tell us where. Remember, we went over for his weekly tea party and he was all moved out."

"Shoot!"

"I can help."

Wait, I know that voice. I turned around and, gasp; it's my MIA friend-turned-bunny, Selphie.

"Selphie!"

"Kairi!"

We rushed at each other full force, when, "wham" I whacked her right in the head.

"What was that for?"

"You left me!"

"Yeah, I'm sorry, I just had no time. I had to tell everyone that you were back. But you had Sora, right?"

So that's why he was there. "He was a great help. Especially when he left me to that door and I got stuck wandering around and…"

I was cut off with a hand over my mouth.

"Let's get going, shall we?" Sora said, keeping his hand firmly in place so Selphie couldn't hear me complain about him anymore.

"Follow me!" Selphie switched moods from suspicious to energetic and started bounding off towards a very foreboding forest off in the distance.

"Here we go." I muttered before running up to catch up.

End Chapter

Happy-kat Hikara


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